cj#524> Well Known Facts About Men (:>)

1996-04-13

Richard Moore

Date: Fri, 12 Apr 1996
To: •••@••.•••
From: "Kelly T. Moore" <•••@••.•••
Subject: Well Known Facts About Men

A little humor to lighten the morning.. ---KTM
Well Known Facts About Men

1. Men like to barbecue. Men will only cook if danger is involved.

2. Men who have pieced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've
experienced pain and bought jewelry.

3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world in which
there are more women then men, it pays to recycle.

4. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

5. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow,
instead of a gun.

8. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have
jobs
and bathe.

9. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in
winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that
snore.

10. Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on the
first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.

11. If you're dating a man who you think might be Mr. Right if he
        (a) got older
        (b) got a new job, or
        (c) visitied a psychiatrist
    you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only
works on cocoons and butterflies.

12. No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he
wished he could be Cary Grant.

13. If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget... he
didn't loose your number... he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.
So I finally phoned and asked him, "Are we going to have sex again?" He
said, "Yes, but not with each other."

14. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get
out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you
want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you... I want to marry
you... I want to have your children."  Sometimes they leave skid marks.

15. Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need
instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.


~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=
Kelly T. Moore, Webmaster
Visigenic Software, Inc.
951 Mariner's Island Blvd., Suite 460
San Mateo, CA 94404  USA
http://www.visigenic.com
E-mail: •••@••.•••
Ph: 415-655-3732
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    Posted by Richard K. Moore  -  •••@••.•••  -  Wexford, Ireland
     Cyberlib:  www | ftp --> ftp://ftp.iol.ie/users/rkmoore/cyberlib
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